


Not my fault

by sur1sur



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy - All Media Types
Genre: Improper metaphors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-02
Updated: 2015-10-09
Packaged: 2018-04-07 07:44:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4255068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sur1sur/pseuds/sur1sur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Some results from Drax's inability to understand Metaphor.<br/>Mostly it is Peter saying the wrong thing but occasionally it will be either Rocket or Gamora making the mistake<br/>Also Groot (although he could be pranking someone when he does it)<br/>Thought of this when writing another story<br/>Feel free to mention any you think  might work with this idea</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Playing Black Jack and it was Drax turn to deal the cards. All lost money went into a jar for the winner money to come out of. Whatever was left was turned over to the ship's expense account.

Gamora looked at her cards she had 15 and said, "One more card, please."

Drax flipped the next card over it was a 7 and he said, "That makes 22, sorry Gamora."

Rocket looked at his cards. He had a pair of aces, so he split them before saying, "I will take one more for each of my cards."

Drax understood Rocket was splitting the cards before saying," You need to put units down to split the pair."

Rocket smiled before putting down 5 units on the second ace and saying, "You are really understanding this game."

Drax replied," It is not hard to understand." Before flipping a card on top of Rocket first card. IT was a 9 and than a king on top of Rocket second card.

Rocket whooped before saying, " I am fine. Your turn, Peter."

Peter looked at the 9 that was showing in Drax's dealer hand and back to his two card totaling 13 before saying, "Hit me."

Drax swung his arm and knocked Peter off of his chair.

Peter got up and rubbed his arm before asking," What was that for."

Drax replied," You said to hit you."

Rocket, Gamora and Groot (who was enjoying watching his friends play) all laughed.

Peter replied," That meant I wanted another card." sitting his chair up and sitting back down.

Drax said," Sorry, but you should said 'One more card' like Gamora." before flipping a king onto Peter's two cards.

Peter replied," I am out."

Rocket said," Show us your other card Drax.

Drax flipped over the card, it was a 4. Drax than flipped over another card from the deck it was a 6. Before saying," Dealer has 19 and pays Rockets for both of his wins."


	2. After a tough mission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter still like using metaphor around the other guardians

Rocket flopped on the couch before saying, "Next time, Nova says it is an easy mission. I want full details of what needs to be done before agreeing to do it."

Gamora stretched out in the chair before saying," I agree with you there, Rocket."

Drax asked," Who turn is it to cook?"

Peter answered, " It is my turn to cook but I am to exhausted to. Why don't we go out to eat."

Rocket replied, "That means undressing, showering, dressing, and than going to the place we want to eat. To much extra work for a meal. I am going for a emergency bar." before getting up.

Gamora said, "While your up, grab one for me, Rocket."

Rocket glared at Gamora before asking," Do you think I am your servant." Before grabbing one bar for him and throwing one to Gamora.

Gamora caught the bar before answering, " Nope and thank for the bar."

Groot said, "I am Groot." 'Rocket could you bring me some water."

Rocket replied," Alright. Next time I will wait until someone else gets up and have them get me one." Before taking the water to Groot.

Peter said, "Hey Rocket how about getting me an emergency bar."

Rocket went back to the couch and lay down before saying, "Your legs are not broken, get one yourself."

Peter grabbed his leg and said, "Oh my poor broken leg."

Drax hearing this immediately grabbed Peter and hurried to the med lab.

Rocket looked to Gamora before they both started laughing.

Drax returned without Peter before saying, " Neither of his legs were broken. SO I left him strapped to the examine table."

Gamora replied, "Drax, he was joking. He wanted Rocket to go back to the kitchen to get him an emergency bar,"

Drax shook his head before saying, "In our line of work, one should not joke about injuries."

Gamora replied," Very true." Before going to unstrap Peter.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The guardians are on vacation.   
> Groot is standing by a running stream  
> Gamora is in the swimming pool  
> Rocket is so bored Peter will not let Rocket build bombs while they are on vacation Nor weapons

Rocket sighed before saying for the hundredth time, " I am so bored. There has to be something fun to do,:"

Peter dropped his head before saying," You can go over by Groot and watch the fishes in the stream. You can join Gamora in the pool or you could have went and got us our drinks."

Rocket replied," I got refreshments for everyone yesterday, Stardork. I just want something to do that is not boring."

Peter remember Rocket liked to play cards before asking, "How about a rematch in gin rummy. A penny a point."

Rocket scratched his chin before saying, " Let us make it a quarter of a penny a point. That way you will not moan so much, when I win."

Peter pulled out a deck of card and quickly shuffle and dealt the cards.

Rocket kept an eye out for Drax.

Peter smiled and said," Gin: and laid his cards down on the table.

Rocket replied, "That makes four hands for you." As he spotted Drax coming with the refreshments.

Peter said," You owe me Three and a half unit, so far."

Rocket quickly shuffle and dealt the cards, as Drax was getting closer.

Peter could not believe his luck. All he needed was to draw a 2 of heart and he would have gin again. Before reaching and grabbing the first card off the top of the deck and flipping it over

Drax placed the refreshment on the table and turn to walk away.

Peter looked at the card, it was the 2 of heart. Before flopping down his hand and saying." Gin and you now owe me just a little under 5 units."

Rocket replied," Your really on fire, Peter." Just loud enough for Drax to hear.

Peter smiled before boasting, "You better believe your little ass that I am on fire."

Drax turned and unable to see where the fire was, quickly grabbed Peter and toss him into the pool before asking," Did that put the fire out."

Rocket snicker before tossing Peter a five unit piece and saying, "I guess Drax put out your fire."

Peter caught the coin and realized Rocket set him up for the unscheduled pool dive.

Rocket said," Now to see what is up with Groot."

Peter shook his head knowing Rocket was going to tell Groot the whole incident.

Gamora swam over to Peter before asking," Why did you not change into your bathing suit before coming into the pool."

Peter sighed before answering," I will explain after I explain another metaphor to Drax." and leaving the pool.

Gamora shrugged and follow Peter out of the pool.


End file.
